Two Way Street
A few years ago I got some crazy virus for more than two weeks that sent me to the urgent care once and the ER twice. I was in the middle of a transition in moving and had been renting a room for a few months with a friend - with a plan to move to my parent’s for couple of weeks before moving internationally. This happened over the holiday week of Thanksgiving and when the holiday weekend was over, the friends I was staying with voiced their concern with me staying there further until I was better. Not because they didn’t want me, but they were concerned they would come home from work one day and I’d be passed out on the floor. I was certainly sick enough to still need someone around in the house, just in case.
Whatever this random illness was, it would put me into a spell where I couldn’t stand and could barely sit up for more than a few minutes before I’d have to lay down so I wouldn’t pass out. Just making a coffee or toast would render me to the couch until I recovered and could get back up to my bed. Needless to say, their concern was warranted and the collective “tribe” of my people agreed I would need to move to my parent’s house a month early to have the care I needed.
There were plenty of people offering to bring me things, help me out, take me to the doctor, and more through the two weeks. I kept others at bay advising I’d let them know if I needed anything. Well, I did and for me it ended up being one of the most vulnerable asks ever. I had to ask a couple of friends to come and help me move. Now, I know a lot of people get help moving, even me, but this was different. They had to come to my house and PACK my belongings in bags, boxes, and suitcases. We had to move my mattress and a recliner chair and I couldn’t help at all. I can’t begin to explain how humbling it is to sit in a chair and direct my friends how to pack up my underwear draw…
I sat there and advised, tried to help but was reprimanded, and learned some valuable lessons along the way. When did our faith as believers become a place where we do it all ourselves? Everything the Bible reveals to me is the collaborative work of others and a total reliance on a relationship. If our lives here are a mirror of heaven and we are to bring Kingdom to earth, than learning to be a person who not only loves others can’t be the end. We must also understand that learning to allow others to love us is, in fact, a direct relation to how well we will love others. Sometimes, when we are a more service focused person, it’s actually easy to go to someone’s house and pack them up, but to sit and let someone pack us up is hard! It was impressed on me as a person who normally can serve, that sometimes the humility it takes for a person in need to accept it is equally hard. I think there is something to be said in how we approach serving others. If we miss where it meets someone and how they work it out, we miss a good part of the process in connection and unity. If you are someone who fights to let others in and just wants to pour out, let others love you, but be sure not to become a swamp. We don’t serve others to be slaves, but to empower them to love others as well.
There is a lesson on both ends of loving others, how we give it and how we receive it. Our lack of being able to receive could actually push someone further away without even knowing it. If we are giving ourselves away to be like Jesus, this is relevant to consider too.
